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A STRANGE FEELING OF EXISTENTIAL ANGST

by SUNFLOWERS

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1.
2.
The touch of grass between my toes And life, contently, so it goes The days are long in a field of green And it gets hard to be seen And wind blows softly through my hair It carries thoughts out of my head The hours blend, the air so clean And it gets hard to be seen
3.
There's a shadow coming over the hill, oh yeah
 Quietly as a yell
 There's no hiding in the digital soil, oh yeah
 You're overflowing the well And a cloud with feeble shield
 Stores the secrets you've concealed 
In the past Within a bubble you decide on your life, oh yeah 
Do you control all your tools? 
If there's no point in a community, oh yeah
 Why should you follow the rules? You have found the lonely sheep 
Not the answers you have seek
 Home at last

4.
Why are you so anxious? Is it faulty design?
 You just stay up for hours past your bedtime
 Feel the itch growing, tap to stream
 And drench yourself slowly on its ominous gleam Why are you so down? Would it hurt you to smile?
 You're digging up a hole you won't be able to climb
 You're not staying informed, you're just being consumed
 Ignoring your health and swallowed by gloom
5.
And if this world should end tonight Drifting through the vast, cold space Hissing longly in its flight Disappeared without a trace Wave goodbye to the old sun Shadows covering up our face And if this world should end tonight Would we fare in Mother's grace? And those crawling, pesty things Cling to their unfaithful gods Balancing on flimsy strings Battling against the odds Man and maggot intertwined As our Mother rolls the dice And those crawling, pesty things Feast on her, no more than twice And as we plunge into our death Someone on some planet far Who will watch us, smile and say "What a pretty shooting star!"
6.
I guess they wanted a change The concrete wears up their feet A city plastered with ads Rendering them obsolete And in the night-heavy streets Brimming with silence and dread Awaken stay the machines Feeding ideas to their head They're not building a wall They're just setting a brick One by one, it closes the sides Strategic planning's the trick Maybe they're daydreaming now Somewhere between songs of praise Confusion's settling in Running around in a maze As air feels heavly compressed Silent as things in the dark It creeps on the back of their head The dog that bites you won't bark They're not building a wall They're just setting a brick Closing exits, one at a time Strategic planning's the trick
7.
Everything is fucked and no one seems to get it Nonchalance's a charm if you don't seem to handle it "Everything will change", I remember what we said But slap another drama so I guess that we'll forget Did everyone change or was it just me? I can't really tell if I've somehow grown People come and go and there's a whole lot to see Everyone is fighting for a dopamine microdose Any kind of change needs to come within ourselves But shouldn't there already be an app for that? When I was a child, they told me "just be yourself" But I don't really know what "myself" really means I've been holding my breath for so long That I no longer know how to exhale Rise up, nonchalants, and vanquish your pet bores Shut down the extraction of organic human data Commodifying thoughts, memories and self expression Your economy needs you to keep consuming Everything is nails if you only have a hammer What's a few dead people between good old friends? Spontaneous eruptions of spectacular dissent The revolution's coming but I gotta pay the bills And I can't go to work, I'm having my daily breakdown All the memories I have were seen through a screen What's the point of living in these modern, global days With all this anxiety looming close over my head? If your lungs were filled by rising seas Would you be content about your life?
8.
Information overload (just ignore it) Brain is seizing Content coming all around (just ignore it) Screen keeps freezing White glow catch your gaze (gasps) Eyes locked, a finger tap Feel your body crave the data Always pulling, mouse trap But did it really happened If they didn't like, share and comment? But did it really happened If I didn't have time to document it? Fuck. People pleaser as I am (just ignore it) Time has meaning Content coming all around (just ignore it) Ears are ringing Pink noise keeps me tamed (gasps) Sleep deprived, another lap Feel your body crave the data Always lust another nap But did it really happened If they didn't like, share and comment? But did it really happened Will an algorithm fix my attention span? What?
9.
10.
Sit tightly, wonder aloud Something's changing Somewhere, somehow Creature comforts, that's what they said Guess I'll go hide Inside my head Masked faces, hiding its bones City cruising Lost on their phones Dying houses, drifting through space Guess we'll go on Swifting our pace
11.
It was motor driven Turning slowly Boxing the compass With electric piety It was poised and reverent Clocking the hour Tracing the orbit With electric piety Electric piety It was marked in constant Stretched impulses Searching for contact With electric piety It was intel loaded Forged in tightly Reading the future With electric piety Electric piety

about

It's been chaotic. We know. Everything is changing all around us, happening in such a fast pace that it gets hard to keep up with all the changing faces, places and idealisms in our collective existence. There's a strange feeling around these days. Hard to put a name on it, or even describe it. We know, we feel it too.

Over the past 3 years, we thought about our existence a lot. Should we keep going? Can we keep going? Do we want to keep going? The answers to these question have changed more often than we expected.
Everyone was trying to tell us that everything's ok. We always felt that it was not.

From being reduced to capitalized human data to the struggle of comprehending a world that we do not think is enough for us or for our future, this record is full of straight-up songs brimmed with nervous energy, making them wobbly and on the edge of calamity.

It's a cathartic expression of what we always felt but ignored: we're angry and we want to talk about it. Delivered like a cartoon skit where the train starts trembling and squealing, at a speed where one small pebble could derail it.

And this train will take you to the most unexpected places - sometimes at extreme volume and ear-grinding sonic annihilation, other times on the wings of seemingly floating synths and reverberated vocal pads. Rest assured, there will be moments at which you'll wonder which part of all of this you’re actually supposed to be enjoying, but you'll always come back for the weirdness of it.

It doesn't provide a model for a better society, or a script for you to follow, and no verdict on our crimes. It leaves you with the knowledge that we're all our own worst enemies, the most brilliant engineers of our own miserable decadence, because the truth is we're the only ones who know how pathetic we truly are.

It's a new journey for us - thanks for sticking around, and welcome if you've just hoped on.

credits

released April 4, 2023

ALL SONGS COMPOSED AND PERFORMED BY SUNFLOWERS. EXCEPT SOME LYRICS IN "ELECTRIC PIETY" TAKEN FROM KURT VONNEGUT'S BOOK "CAT'S CRADLE". THANKS KV FOR HOURS OF WONDER. ARTWORK & LAYOUT BY CARLOS DE JESUS.
SPECIAL THANKS TO OUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS, AND EVERYONE THAT'S BEEN SUPPORTING OUR WORK THROUGHOUT THE YEARS. WE LOVE YOU.

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PRODUCED BY CARLOS DE JESUS AND CAROLINA BRANDÃO.
RECORDED AND ENGINEERED BY CARLOS DE JESUS AT ARDA RECORDERS IN PORTO, BETWEEN JANUARY AND SEPTEMBER 2022. ASSISTED BY CAROLINA BRANDÃO.
ADDITIONAL RECORDING AND MIXING BY CARLOS DE JESUS AT ELECTRIC CLOUD.
MASTERED BY CLARA ARAÚJO AT ARDA RECORDERS.

____________________________________________

SUNFLOWERS ON THIS RECORD:
CARLOS DE JESUS - GUITARS, VOCALS, SYNTHS AND KEYBOARDS, DRUM MACHINES, PERCUSSION, NOISE AND FX
CAROLINA BRANDÃO - DRUMS, VOCALS, DRUM MACHINES, SYNTHS AND KEYBOARDS, PERCUSSION, NOISE AND FX
FREDERICO FERREIRA - BASS, NOISE AND FX

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